Aside from my family and photography one of my other passions in life is fitness, with an emphasis on running. For as long as I can remember I've been reading about and studying the fitness industry and science of the body. Also for as long as I can remember fitness hacks have gotten under my skin. Very few things tick me off more than these so-called wellness or fitness companies ( and I use the word fitness loosely ) and how they sell outright lies to make a buck and get away with it. Each time I see a new commercial for the latest and greatest weight loss product I cringe and start to mumble incoherent vulgarities at the tv. So to vent, venting is good therapy or so I'm told, I thought it would be fun to talk about some of the craziest, silliest, downright stupid, money wasting exercise equipment of the past few decades.
I was going to do a blog on what seems to me to be the number one lie being sold and that is spot fat loss. Most of the equipment I'm going to show you claim that it targets certain areas of your body for fat loss. Shake me and your arm flab will go away. Push me and your beer gut will disappear and you will have the chest of a Greek Andonis. Swallow me and you will lose 10lbs overnight. That last one might be true as you will be stuck on the toilet for twenty-four hours thinking you're going to die.
A study conducted by the American College of Sports Medicine found that spot reduction training could lead to overtraining, which can be counterintuitive and can actually cause an increase in body fat. So if you come away from reading this remembering one thing remember this, SPOT FAT LOSS IS BS and meant to bilk you of your hard earned money. But if you are really, really intent on throwing your money away let me know and I'll give you my P.O. Box. It will go to a better cause than this equipment I guarantee that.
Ok, ok I'll get down off of my soapbox and quit bitching. In 2016 Americans spent over $60,000,000,000.00, yup you read that right, sixty billion dollars. It's reported that 75 million Americans are trying to lose weight so that comes to $800 dollars per person per year. 3 billion is spent on weight loss chains like weight watchers, 3 billion is spent on diet pills and meal replacements and billions are being spent on clothing and gym memberships that may never be used. Now if I was a shady character like some of these companies especially the ones you see on infomercials I would have invented one of these idiotic pieces of equipment and would be living the good life sipping my bulletproof coffee on my own private island off the coast of Dubi. With that being said let's have some fun and maybe a laugh or two and look at my top ten list of some of the dumbest exercise equipment ever made. On a side note, I picked the shortest commercials I could find but they are still hysterical. In no particular order,
#1 The Shake Weight
There's no motor or batteries, it's the power of 240 muscle contractions in 1 minute. The only reason this commercial went viral is because of all the dirty minded people out there. But alas people bought it hook line and sinker. A sinker or paperweight is about all it's good for.
#2 The Thigh Master
One of my all-time favorites. I'm not gonna lie, my better half bought one of these in the early 90's and I actually used it cause we had it, and all the extra fat on my arms just melted away and my thighs and biceps were like steel, NOT. Squeeze, Squeeze, Squeeze your way to shapely hips and thighs.
3# The Treadmill Bike
I guess the old style bike with pedals just wasn't healthy enough. Let's have a bike we can walk on WTF seriously. The Treadmill Bike nuff said.
#4 The Flex Belt
When it comes to getting a strong sexy stomach, hard work pays off eventually but smart work pays too. Over 2 million suckers, I mean people in over 30 countries have discovered that they wasted their money and still had to hit the gym and eat right.
#5 Leg Magic Ultra
Ha, ha, ha, nothing I could say can do it justice, you just need to watch, but wait there's more.
#6 The Bite Counter
Designed by two Clemson professors who had nothing better to do and a bet that there are millions of suckers out there. Because eating isn't fun enough let's wear a watch that counts our bites. You can't make this crap up.
#7 Steelcase walk station
I don't know about you but I have enough trouble typing while sitting at my desk, but hey if you can walk and chew gum ( which I can't ) why not. I wonder if my wellness committee would go for this?
#8 Cool Shapes Freeze Away
Another one you need to see to believe. It's a long video and I dare you to watch over a minute of it without laughing so hard you'll cry. These are basically spanks with pockets for ice packs.
#9 Bosom Buddy
Are you sagging a little bit in the chest area ladies? Well, this is just the product you need. It works those hard to train muscles that naturally lift and separate, and I have some beach front property in Montana for you as well. I love the after shot. Couldn't be that her shoulders are back and her back is arched could it? Well done Karen.
#10 The Hawaii Chair
What a catchy little tune. "Take the work out of your workout, The Hawaii Chair". Along with the walk station, I'm going to see if I can get one of these for my office as well. And to think people actually buy this garbage. Must be seen to be believed. Seriously watch Erin Lee and tell me you're not busting a gut right now. "If you can sit you can get fit, The Hawaii Chair."
I hope you enjoyed this top ten list and had a good chuckle or two. I'm thinkin next week I may do a top ten most ridiculous infomercial products. As always, I would really appreciate it if you would sign up for my email list. FaceBooks new algorithm is going to make it very hard for pages to be seen unless there are a lot of meaningful comments on the posts. I won't send spam emails, just updates on blogs, products or discounts. Also if you have the time click on one of the banner ads and take a look around, you might see something you like.
If there is something that interests you and would like to read it on my pages let me know, comments are very welcome. Have a great week all.